on january 4th, i started a new job as a legislative aid to representative morita for the 2010 hawaii state legislative session. it’s been a grueling couple of weeks and with opening day officially kicking off the legislative season yesterday, i expect things to get even tougher.
if you’re a regular visitor here, you’ll know i’m not one for over confidence, or really any confidence at all, but this job is the first i’ve had in a long time that often has me feeling overwhelmed. as someone who thought he had a pretty good bead on how things work at the legislature, feel like i’m learning to walk all over again. unless you’ve spent countless hours and years at the capitol, or have worked a session job before, there’s really no way for me to describe how it is. More…
as i’m sure others have said, the year has flown by. at the same time, though, it seems like so much has happened in the world, in america, and in my life. i’m in such a different place in my life now than i was at the beginning of the year; january 2009 seems so long ago….
here’s a month-by-month breakdown. maybe not the sexiest way to do it, but maybe the easiest? More…
i’ve been a bit obsessed with this group lately. and since my brain can’t seem to muster a proper post, this is what i’m settling for at the moment….
i’d never heard of them before until a few weeks ago. i was in mokuleia, celebrating thanksgiving with good friends, which has become a tradition for me (if i’m in hawaii for the holiday). one of the people who came to spend a day at the beach house brought her ipod full of good music stuffs. sigur rós was one of the bands.
shortly after my return to honolulu, i bought two of their albums, which is unusual for me. when i find a new band, i just buy one album at a time. but in this instance, something about the one song i had heard was so great that i was confident neither album (takk….and ( ) ) would disappoint. i was right.
this is pretty much all i’ve been listening to for the last few weeks, at home, in the car, while walking, etc. and i can’t get enough. normally, i prefer my ‘car music’ to be something to which i can sing along, but Sigur Rós is so ethereal and melodic, that it doesn’t matter the lyrics are icelandic.
i highly recommend checking them out, if you’re not already a fan. as for me, my music guru said she’ll be getting me more soon…! in the meantime, check out this video:
for reasons unclear to me, i’ve been thinking a lot about death. not in terms of a self-inflicted death, but rather the nature of death, what it means and what comes next. and in thinking about what comes next, thoughts inevitably turn to notions of faith.
when i was a young child, i may have had faith, but if i did, that faith has long since left me. as far back as i can remember, i’ve never really had a belief in g-d, in the spiritual, in the afterlife. with that lack of faith came a desire to find other means by which to define, to borrow the title of one of my favorite books, life, the universe and everything.
looking back now, i think the drive to understand existence, not to mention my lack of faith, stemmed from deep-seeded self-doubt and the chronic depression from which i suffered. More…
my brain is of a peculiar sort. it has always had a tendency to grab a hold of ideas, thoughts, impractical (or impossible) scenarios and chew on them until there’s nothing left. even ideas, things that in reality have no real value or merit will often claim my preoccupation, using up large amounts of processing power. since i was a child, my brain has had this tendency and i have not, as of yet, figured out a way to let go of all thoughts inconsequential.
such is occurring now and began yesterday afternoon. i got a call from one of my best and oldest friends as he and his wife were driving back from a weekend out of town. in typical fashion, he started ‘harassing’ me about my… lack of dating and mentioned a girl i know, who is recently single, but doesn’t live in hawaii.
we often joke about these things; he insists and gives reasons why i should relocate away from hawaii and i insist, giving reasons of my own, he should just relocate here. of course, neither is very likely. still, joking or not, the suggestion has been festering in my brain since yesterday.
i decided years ago that the lack of dating opportunities here was not a good reason to relocate to larger pools. i have a life here that is, for the most part, successful and i see no reason to leave for a singular reason such as this. of course, having said this, there is that part of my brain that chews on ridiculous, impractical, and impossible scenarios that can’t help but chew on my friend’s playful suggestion that i abandon hawaii for brighter potential(s)….
if you aren’t already aware, i have a tendency to talk to myself. and not just in my head like jd from scrubs. i actually speak out loud to myself. usually i don’t do this when there are people around, strangers or otherwise, though its been known to happen. essentially i’m just talking thinking out loud, but in a conversational style.
i’ve also a tendency, though with less frequency, to sing quietly to myself if i’ve got a particular song in my head. sometimes i don’t even realize i’m doing it, especially if i’m concentrating on something else. like ordering dinner. More…
i love my roommate, as he is one of my oldest friends, and i know he’s often just looking out for me, trying to help, and the like, but sometimes sees things that aren’t there, or pushes in ways that aren’t necessary.
it is the most recent example of this and the circumstances surrounding it that i’ve deemed post-worthy.
i brought a friend to the house earlier this week, a friend of the opposite-sex-variety which, as my roommate pointed out, is a rarity, and so he was immediately intrigued. his excitement and interest is, admittedly, one of the reasons i don’t often bring girls around. when i do, i feel like the special olympics athlete who’s come in last place. “oh, you’re so great! good for you! i’m so proud!” while i know that’s not his intention, it is nonetheless just a bit humiliating. More…
