goals

This feels like the last straw.

I’m not sure this will ever be published. Or, maybe published, but not “shared”. This is mostly because I’m concerned this post will read as… pitiful. And despite anything else, I am not looking for pity. I never have and don’t particularly like the idea of people feeling sorry for me.

Whether I was looking for it or not, it appears I may have come to a crossroads in my life. Certainly not the first and possibly not the last. I’m not sure how to proceed and I’m not sure how to reconcile my feelings of grief and anger with anything that comes next.

Last week I lost my dream job. One that checked every career box I’d listed for myself. It’s been given to someone else. But, before I get into the details of that gargantuan disappointment, I need to go back. Way back.

Read more

While participating in a national training for progressive campaign managers, I heard for the first time a phrase that clicked a light switch in my head: imposter syndrome. As described during one of the training sessions, imposter syndrome is a feeling that you’re not good enough, qualified enough, or experienced enough to do the work.

What Is It?

As it was described to me, it was like someone had peered into my brain. I had no idea that this feeling I’ve experienced for years, was an actual thing. A thing with a name and a definition. I’ve never really be much moved by the “you’re not alone” sentiment. But knowing that I’m not crazy, at least in one instance, is comforting.

Read more

I think everyone can agree that 2021, while better than the prior year, was nonetheless a steaming pile.

COVID-19

As the year began and the promise of a vaccine became reality. There was a collective holding of breaths hoping to see an end to the pandemic and a return to normalcy. Well, as we approach the end of the year, case counts in Hawaii reached a new all-time high well over 3,000. Which is approximately double the number of our last peak at the end of August.

“Omicron” is now raging in Hawaii and there appears to be no end in sight. Though Hawaii’s vaccination rate has slowly crept up to just above 74% statewide.

Read more

The meaning of life and more.

Thoughts on 43

Today I turn 43.

I’m marking the occasion in usual fashion, with one exception. I chose to spend the few days leading up to and following my birthday staying with friends in the remote volcanic forest landscape of Ocean View on the Big Island of Hawaii. Perhaps its unsurprising that this is the first travel of any kind I’ve done the end of 2019 before COVID-19 forced a shuttering of the world.

Read more