i’m not kidding when i say i’m a restless sleeper. the sheet-mattress clamps are real and even with them it’s only a matter of time before sheets are kicked off the bed. it’s been this way for me since i was a child and it hasn’t gotten better as i’ve gotten older.

i have a misfit shine (and previously a jawbone up wristband) that can track my sleep patterns. i’m not really sure how accurate these little bits of technology are at measuring the quality of my nightly rest. my shine tells me that even on those nights when the time between i go to bed and the time when i get up is eight hours or more, i never get more than three or four hours of “restful sleep”. by tracking my movement it seems to be telling me that even when i’m asleep, i still don’t seem to be getting a lot of rest.

to get a solid eight hours of restful sleep, it seems i’d have to have about 15 hours, give or take, every night to devote to sleeping. that doesn’t seem very efficient and is unlikely to happen.

i have contemplated visiting a sleep clinic. at my next regularly scheduled check up, i do plan on talking to my doctor about this stuff. or, at a minimum, ask him how accurate he thinks these little sleep trackers, like my misfit, are at calculating my quality and duration of sleep.

and maybe i’m off and most people don’t wake up every morning remembering their dreams, but i’ve always had the impression that most people do have, at least, a sense that they dream.

i don’t have that sense. not regularly. there are very rare mornings, i’d say easily less than once a month, when i wake up and have a sense that i dreamt the night before. its even more rare that i actually remember anything about a dream i had.

descriptively, the asteroid dream is pretty straight forward and i don’t think i need to say anything more about it.

the other dream(s) is much harder to verbalize, put into words.

what i can say is this; in much the same way the asteroid, house, and backyard in the other dream were always exactly the same, so was, at least for a long time, the girl in my dreams. in the most obvious, literal sense, it was the girl of my dreams, which was kind of nice. however, what i think i used to find the most frustrating, and intriguing, was that the girl didn’t look like anyone i knew in my waking life.

the girl in the most recent iterations is different from those dreams when i was younger. looking back, there’s a part of me that thinks the dream girl from the earliest versions bore a striking resemblance to katie, though i can’t be sure (and it would be equal parts depressing and unbelievable) and instead tell myself that it’s simply the romantic and wishful part of my brain that makes the comparison (i don’t think the earlier dream girl versions were red-headed).

these love-longing-inspired dreams have become both less frequent and less jarring as i’ve gotten older. i chalk this up to not being quite so enamored by the idea of reckless true love and that i don’t look to being coupled as my only chance for happiness (all things being equal, i like my life now). still, even now, I can’t wake up from one of these types of dreams without being a little shaken, a little unsettled. the main difference now is this; in the past these dreams would leave me all but useless, unable to do much other than sit and wallow. now, they may darken my mood and my outlook, but cannot distract me from more purposeful endeavors.

ahh, what a difference therapy can make.

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while browsing (wasting time?) on facebook the other day, i came across a slate.com article about a supreme court ruling having to do with the the fifth amendment rights of individuals. upon closer inspection, i noticed the article was from 2013, as was the court ruling. i’m not sure why i didn’t see this article previously and am curious as to why it’s trending up on facebook now.

to review, here’s the fifth amendment:

No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offense to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.

rather than lay out the whole thing in writing, just watch the video…. what it boils down to is this: if you haven’t been arrested and read your miranda rights, you may not have the right to remain silent. if you’re asked questions by law enforcement without having been arrested or mirandized, either decline to answer, or get yourself a lawyer.

also, here’s a link to the court decision, in case you feel so inclined to read it.

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i know i said i’d have a post ready yesterday, talking about a supreme court decision from last year, but that didn’t happen. and i’m a day late.

there seems to be far less information, commentary, etc. on the 5th amendment and miranda rights than on some of the other amendments. i guess the 5th just isn’t that interesting. as such, i wasn’t ready to record anything about it.

the next one will likely be about the homeless situation on oahu and the insensitive way the honolulu city council is choosing to address the issue.

i’ve already started putting thoughts together in my head, so i think i’ll be ready to post for thursday.

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…in any format. in case you didn’t catch that, i’ll say it again. dating sucks in any format. online dating or real-world dating, both fill me equally with trepidation.

i’m sorry it’s taken me a little long to get this post up here. it’s been up on youtube for a few days now and have even gotten some feedback.

a friend of mine from college suggested checking out okcupid.com. its another dating site, a free one, and where she met her husband.

free is good, however, before signing up, i looked at some reviews online, some comparisons between eharmony, match, and okcupid. as one might expect, all three have their pros and cons. according to most of the reviews i read, match is the best value for the money, with the qualifier that you’ll likely have to sift through large numbers of profiles to find one worth looking at more closely. this mirrors my experience with the site. eharmony seems to be good for those who are really serious about meeting someone, but allows for no interaction (you can’t even look at pictures or extended profiles) without a paid subscription, which would set me back about $60 a month. anyone want to pitch in to help? okcupid, according to my friend, is pretty good. however, because its free i’d likely have to sift through even larger piles of crap than match before maybe coming across someone promising. online reviews more or less say the same thing.

so, while i continue to contemplate how badly i want to be coupled (is it really worth $60 a month to me?) i might check out okcupid.

there are things about my personality and psyche, which i consciously left out of the video, that make dating an even steeper hill to climb than what i’ve already laid out. despite that part of me that wants to be coupled, there are other, potentially stronger, parts of me that simply have too much fear, doubt, and psychological damage to make dating anything more than an exercise in futility.

sorry, some things are just too embarrassing for the public forum of the internet…. you’ll just have to take my word for it. i hope you enjoy the video nonetheless.

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this is my first video recorded out and away from my bedroom and my house. i hadn’t planned to do it.

after a weekend of being lazy, i decided to go for a walk. i brought my iphone and earphones for music listening and had thought about recording a bit as i walked toward the back of palolo valley. it can be really pretty in the evening, or as the clouds are rolling over from the windward side. it was getting late in the day and i hadn’t gotten very far when i realized recording a sunset over waikiki would be a not-too-bad way to do my first “remote” video.

so, i hustled back to my house, grabbed the camera and mic rig, mini tripod and drove up to pu’uo kaimuki park. those of you who’ve been there before, know its got a pretty nice view of kaimuki and waikiki. when i got there, i found i wasn’t the only one. there were a few couples enjoying a late-afternoon picnic, some kids playing, and another guy looking to take some shots of the view.

after doing almost every video so far, i’ve learned something. something to make it better, hopefully, the next time around. what became abundantly clear while trying to sort out the shots, as well as later on while editing them, was that i need to do a better job of planning out the videos. i started out by shooting the 200 degree view, then did the sunset, then sat down to record myself. at the time, i thought i’d show the two other shots first, then record myself. however, i ended up, as you can see, showing you the view first, then myself, then the sunset.

if i’d put a little more thought into it, i would have realized at the time that this was the better way to do it and adjusted my self shot accordingly. i knew this was going to be a learning process.

and as i just finished uploading yesterday’s video, my bed time is fast approaching, and i’m already thinking about what i’ll be talking (and how to say it) for the next video….

oh, and by the way, you should take some time to check out dexter britain. i came across his music randomly while watching a video on facebook and think it’s great stuff.

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