for a change, i thought i’d write about something other than girls, or how life sucks, or blah blah blah….

nowadays, when i have a bad day, or when i’m in a bad mood, there isn’t much of a reason. at least, there’s no reason that i can easily find. bad moods come on me pretty suddenly and inexplicably and i don’t have much choice but to suck it up and ride them out. the good thing is, though, nowadays, those bad moods don’t last more than a day or two, at the most.

despite this new trend (yes, it’s a new thing for me and i’m still trying to get used to it), it’s still rare that i’m in a good mood. generally speaking, i’m pretty even keel, so to speak. i mean, usually i’m not in a bad mood, but not in a good mood either. it seems that i just am. and while i don’t know how i feel about that generally common state of being, it’s a topic for another post.

today, i wanted to take time and write about a good mood, particularly the good mood i’m in today. it’s strange to me. other than it’s friday, today isn’t any different than yesterday, or the day before. still, somehow i’m in a particularly good mood. i haven’t a clue as to why. don’t get me wrong, i’m not complaining about this. good moods are… well… good. and they’re so rare for me that, when i’m actually in a good mood, i’m in a really good mood. it’s something that i get excited about. i sort of revel in my good moods.

i can’t help but ask the question, though: why am i in a good mood? what is it about today, in particular, that put me in such a good mood? i mean, today isn’t really any different than any other day during the work week. i got up with some reluctance, showered, ate breakfast, drove to work, and so on. nothing extraordinary. yet, somehow today is different. i’m peppy. chipper.

if i were like this most of the time, i wouldn’t bother asking why. or what the trigger was. but since it doesn’t happen regularly, my brain automatically struggles to find a reason. for every effect, there is a cause. i can’t help but want to know the cause of this particular good mood.

what is ultimately frustrating about all this is that there is no reason. i didn’t feel any different when i woke up this morning, or when i was driving to work. but all of a sudden, i was chipper and upbeat, without so much as a hint to the reason. if i could find the reason, the cause, maybe it’d be something i can duplicate everyday, or at least try. that way i’d be happier more of the time….

i don’t know, maybe there is no reason, no cause. maybe this is just how it works and since it’s all pretty new to me, i haven’t figured that part out yet. i guess what it comes down to, what i have to accept that fact that there may not be a reason. i should be happy with being happy and say to hell with the cause.