some people get the urge to buy clothes, or cars, or electronics, movies, shoes, etc. when i get the urge to shop, it is almost always for music and the urge came upon me yesterday. after finishing with a party function yesterday afternoon, i ventured to borders to pick out some great new cds to take home with me.
granted, i didn’t actually end up getting anything i had on my list when i went in, but the outing was nonetheless successful. after some deliberation, i picked out four albums:
may 31, 2009 will go down in history, no doubt, as one of my best birthdays ever. one of my best and oldest friends got married on that date and not only was i there to bear witness to the event with my own eyes, but i was honored to be one of the groomsmen.
i had, sort of, intended to write a separate post for each day of the celebration weekend, but there was simply too much fun to be had and what little time i had to myself was used for sleep. as such, you’re going to get a rundown of the whole weekend in one, wopping post. here we go….
i made reference, a few posts back, to the notion of this blog as a therapy of sorts. while that may not have been its conscious design, that is quickly what it became. i’m not lamenting, necessarily, this thing’s function for me, simply pointing it out again.
because of its underlying therapeutic nature, i’ve noticed more than once, i’m more inclined to write when things are less than good: when i’ve got a problem, issue, or there’s generally just something gnawing at my brain.
when things are good, i post with less frequency and when i do, those posts are generally shorter and tend to be random musings about… whatever. when things are good, for whatever reason, i feel i have less to write about.
well, over the last few days, my need to write has been steadily increasing. and while trying to force sleep last night, i was giving a bit of thought to this curious need of mine to write when something in my life begins circling the drain. i can’t say i had an epiphany of sorts, because honestly, i don’t feel the conclusion i came to was particularly insightful. in a less frazzled and exhausted state, the answer would have come, i imagine, almost instantly.
for the record, it’s just about 8am on friday. not only was i at work more than an hour early, but i’ve been awake for more than two hours now. its going to be a LONG day, even with an iv drip of coffee. grr….
insomnia isn’t a new thing for me, as my regular readers are probably already aware. every few months i go through a bout of it, which is much better than four or five years ago when coaxing sleep was a weekly challenge. still, despite its familiarity, it never stops being annoying and is a regular reminder of the troubled psyche with which i’ve battled since childhood.
and this particular bout is no different….
i’m damaged beyond repair.
and sometimes life isn’t fair.