i know i’ve posted about dreams previously, but i feel the need to do so yet again. my facility to remember nightly dreams is so limited, that when i wake with lingering images, sounds, and feelings, i’m always startled and amazed. i had one such dreams several nights ago.

unfortunately a busy schedule and a previously started essay delayed my writing this post and, as such, those images, sounds, and feelings have faded even further into the recesses of my already poor memory.

so, i’ve been chewing on this for a few days and continue to do so. what’s more, and not surprisingly so, there is a part of me that is hesitant to post on this particular topic. while i should easily be able to avoid the use of names, the specifics of what is to follow will make it a snap for certain people close to me to know what the hell it is i’m talking about.

it seems the dilemma of posting what’s in my brain, while attempting to maintain anonymity for those people referenced will be an on going one. perhaps i’ll never be able to escape it. nonetheless, as my readership grows ever so slowly, without consequences, i am feeling bolder in the subjects about which i choose to post. with this in mind, here we go….

i’ve been thinking about my job a bit lately. i definitely love it, think its a great opportunity to learn, but i’m not sure how to make the most of it.

put another way, i need to be more pro-active. give me a project, assignment, etc., and i can do it. i even think i can do it well, but when things are quiet and there isn’t a project in process or pending, i find i have trouble finding something on my own. in the past it hasn’t been a problem. i can’t say as i’ve cared much because i’ve never really had a job i really liked before. i’ve always done my job well, but in this case, i want to make the most of it. i want to learn. i want to be pro-active and make the most of my time in this job. i’m just not sure how to do it.

i definitely feel lucky to have landed this job and while i don’t expect to be in it forever, i do want to make the most of it while i’m here… however long that is. i think a conversation with my boss is in order.

of course, if you have any suggestions, i’m certainly open to them.